Good Guy Erik Chats with the Finalists

[Erik R.]

DANIELLE YOU PIECE OF HUMAN SCUM HOW DARE YOU HAVE THE NERVE TO SIT IN THAT FINAL 2 SEAT WHEN LITERALLY ANYONE INCLUDING GREG AND PENNER AND LIL AND TAJ AND RUPERT DESERVE IT MORE THAN YOU

nah

I guess I'm closing things out, so I'll keep it positive.  As I always do.

First off, Danielle, you'll be hearing no bitter "your very presence in this final disgusts me" rants here.  I admire your fight in this tribal and your battle to be competitive in spite of your own personal circumstances and I ESPECIALLY appreciate your unyielding, if perplexing, loyalty to myself, and also to Sean throughout the post-merge. People here are acting like you're an idiot who doesn't know how to play the game and was never active.  Which I sort of get, but I also know that I talked to you fairly often compared to, say, LJ, and I feel like I actually did get to know you on a bit of a personal level and it surprises me when people imply you have no strategical concept of how to succeed in this game.  Because in our brief talks, it was very clear that you CAN play this game and that's part of why I was so surprised you never turned on me and Sean while I was in the game or in the following votes.  If you had time, I have no doubt you would be one of this game's elite competitors and the only thing I'm bitter about is you winning an unnecessary immunity, the only person who beat me in that challenge, the night I went home.  But, such is life. Your sheer loyalty to me alone makes you far from the last person in this room I would give the million to.  Congratulations on getting here and congratulations on dating a hot redhead.  I'm a big fan myself so go you.  But alas, your opponent tonight is Malcolm, and Malcolm played a fantastic game.  *turns to Malcolm* Malcolm, you played a fantastic game.  Even parts of it I wasn't really aware of until tonight, such as your ability to be in tight with both factions on Letterman without anyone deciding you were untrsutworthy, which was remarkable.  As I've mentioned time and time again, your play at the Greg vote was one of THE MOST POETIC THINGS I HAVE EVER SEEN ON THIS SHOW.  And your adherence to a brilliant ally who is also a whole lot less likable and more threatening to you was also a phenomenal play.  Alexis took the heat, you turned on the jets in challenges and turned on the charm at camp, and here you are in the finals with maybe 1 single enemy on the jury while she sits over there surrounded by several people who maybe aren't her biggest fan.  Maybe my only knock on you is that someone else beat you to the punch in eliminating Alexis before you could, but I believe you when you say it was in your plans.  You're here, you're here with an apparently non-respected opponent, and you're here facing a jury that really, really, truly likes you.  And I think you're a standup guy.

So here's my questions for you all:

For both of you, answer the classic "Who is one person that deserves to be sitting up there more than you?"  And Malcolm, Alexis does not, in my opinion, deserve to be sitting up there more than you.  So please say someone else.

For Malcolm, all I need from you specifically is 400 coherent words or more on literally anything you would like to talk about.  The only catch?

YOU CAN'T USE A SINGLE MOTHERF*CKING "\O/" IN YOUR RESPONSE OR YOU AUTOMATICALLY LOSE MY VOTE, NO QUESTIONS ASKED

And Danielle:

The main knock on you is that your social game sucked.  Which yeah, it wasn't A+.  Which you have established yourself.  So anyways, I would like you to now do some blatant jury pandering and name one positive thing or life fact about each jury member based off your conversations you had with them.  And if you can't do that for one of us, just be honest and admit that you didn't have the interactions necessary to do so for that person.  Because I KNOW you were more active and more aware of your surroundings (see: Majority Rules challenge) than people give you credit for so I want to give you the chance to prove that now.

Thanks guys, I really am a big fan of you both and I hope to see you both have success.

[Erik R.]

And now, I would like to address my fellow jury members...nah just playin, I won't be that guy.

Also, Malcolm, in regards to your answer to Alexis' question...I would probably vote for you over her in a F2

[Malcolm]

I guess I'm closing things out, so I'll keep it positive. As I always do.

First off, Danielle, you'll be hearing no bitter "your very presence in this final disgusts me" rants here. I admire your fight in this tribal and your battle to be competitive in spite of your own personal circumstances and I ESPECIALLY appreciate your unyielding, if perplexing, loyalty to myself, and also to Sean throughout the post-merge. People here are acting like you're an idiot who doesn't know how to play the game and was never active. Which I sort of get, but I also know that I talked to you fairly often compared to, say, LJ, and I feel like I actually did get to know you on a bit of a personal level and it surprises me when people imply you have no strategical concept of how to succeed in this game. Because in our brief talks, it was very clear that you CAN play this game and that's part of why I was so surprised you never turned on me and Sean while I was in the game or in the following votes. If you had time, I have no doubt you would be one of this game's elite competitors and the only thing I'm bitter about is you winning an unnecessary immunity, the only person who beat me in that challenge, the night I went home. But, such is life. Your sheer loyalty to me alone makes you far from the last person in this room I would give the million to. Congratulations on getting here and congratulations on dating a hot redhead. I'm a big fan myself so go you. But alas, your opponent tonight is Malcolm, and Malcolm played a fantastic game. *turns to Malcolm* Malcolm, you played a fantastic game. Even parts of it I wasn't really aware of until tonight, such as your ability to be in tight with both factions on Letterman without anyone deciding you were untrsutworthy, which was remarkable. As I've mentioned time and time again, your play at the Greg vote was one of THE MOST POETIC THINGS I HAVE EVER SEEN ON THIS SHOW. And your adherence to a brilliant ally who is also a whole lot less likable and more threatening to you was also a phenomenal play. Alexis took the heat, you turned on the jets in challenges and turned on the charm at camp, and here you are in the finals with maybe 1 single enemy on the jury while she sits over there surrounded by several people who maybe aren't her biggest fan. Maybe my only knock on you is that someone else beat you to the punch in eliminating Alexis before you could, but I believe you when you say it was in your plans. You're here, you're here with an apparently non-respected opponent, and you're here facing a jury that really, really, truly likes you. And I think you're a standup guy.

You're a class act, Erik. Just wanted to say that. Had I been on the jury, I definitely would have taken that approach and tried to say something positive about both finalists. Thanks for wrapping up the show here with a not so depressing outlook on things.

For both of you, answer the classic "Who is one person that deserves to be sitting up there more than you?" And Malcolm, Alexis does not, in my opinion, deserve to be sitting up there more than you. So please say someone else.

I don't think anyone deserves to be in the finale more than Danielle or I because our game-play did get ourselves to the end. Back in grade school when we had those spelling bee competitions, you couldn't say that someone who made it to the finals didn't deserve to be there. They obviously knew a little something that the other competitors didn't know, yeah? I think this random ass example still applies to this game in a sense that we the finalists did something right to get here, and therefore these spots are absolute. No one else deserves my spot, because I earned it.

If I didn't make it to the end though, I would have loved to see Sean make it here. I can relate to the his pre-jury run because we both hitting every single TC, with no break to chill out. We basically shadowed each other later on because while I was building up Alex to be the bigger threat then me, he was doing the same exact thing with you. I have mad respect for his strategic game and he never lost his cool when votes didn’t go down the way he wanted. Had the most entertaining persona for sure and it would have been fun to watch him whip out a speech at FTC.

For Malcolm, all I need from you specifically is 400 coherent words or more on literally anything you would like to talk about.

I am thoroughly disturbed by your poop shrine. You scarred me for life. I’m going to attempt to clean it up so it doesn’t do permanent damage to the island's ecosystem. YOU WERE GOING TO KILL EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING WITH THAT PILE OF CRAP. Since you can’t get your shit together, I guess it looks like I’ma have to do that for you. I have gathered some research on how to properly dispose of it, along with poop in general:



At some point in everyone’s life, we’re going to find ourselves wondering how to clean poop. Maybe you have a pet or two. Maybe you’ve got a child or a cancer patient who needs help. Maybe you caught some horrible virus and just couldn’t help yourself. Or maybe Erik was casted for the Survivor ORG you are playing in. It happens.

Before we get into how to clean poop from clothing, furniture, carpeting, and hard surfaces, let’s talk about why it’s important to clean it. I can think of few people, aside from drunken frat boys perhaps such as Alexis, who don’t feel compelled to scrub and sanitize poop the instant they find it. And that’s a good thing, for a number of reasons.

In addition to convincing yourself that your own poop doesn’t stink, you may also rest assured, Fairplay, that your own poop probably won’t make you sick even if you somehow manage to infect yourself with it orally.

In fact, some experts (pause to contemplate there are people who are experts about poop) say that ingesting your own poop might actually be healthy… unless, like Dolly, the very thought turns your 12 year old stomach. That said, unless you live alone and never have anyone over, touch anything, or go anywhere; Danielle, you should still clean up your own poop ASAP, because ew.

How To Clean Poop From Hard Surfaces
• Cleaning gloves
• A disposable plastic bag (Greg)
• Something to scrape with (a paper plate you can toss works nicely)
• Cleaning cloths or paper towels
• Disinfecting spray or wipes
•

Oct 21, 2015 3:14:24 GMT Erik R. said:

patience

1. Dry wipe first: Put gloves on and, using dry paper towels, wipe up as much poop from the surface as you can. Toss the towels into the plastic bag.
2. Wet wipe second: Get more paper towels wet with HOT Stephanie water and wipe up the remaining mess. Add them to the plastic bag and throw the whole thing out.
3. Disinfect then let dry: Wet the area liberally with a disinfectant. Allow it to sit for 5 minutes, or according to Sean’s directions. (Don’t just assume you know what the label says; Dave it takes a lot longer to disinfect than to clean Fat Mike’s ass.) Wipe again with clean water and allow the area to dry.

Also, Malcolm, in regards to your answer to Alexis' question...I would probably vote for you over her in a F2

Sweeeeeet

[danielle]

Well I'm on my phone at work, which makes answering the questions difficult, but I'd say I definitely have already proven in my answers to other people that I had more going on than anybody knew. I had a lot of influence in the last few rounds, and had positioned myself in such a way that people were looking at me as someone who could be worked with in their plans going forward. I knew better than to stick my head out a lot of times, and let people take out the visible threats while weaving myself in good with you and Sean while still keeping tabs on what Malexis were up to.

I'd give better answers than that, but thanks to the stupid early FTC deadline and my body deciding I really really needed to sleep for fifteen hours last night, that's all I can give ya right now. :/

[danielle]

And as for who deserves to be sitting up here: Sean for being an epic underdog, or Fairplay in light of the effort he put into that last challenge.